You Look Different Without Your Dildo By Jared - 07/22/2003 - 8:58am Last night I received the greatest welcoming line from someone I have never met, and really only knows me from reading this site. That line would be "you look different without your dildo". I mean, you really can't top that... Last week I met someone who gave me an interesting angle on the issue of vegetarianism. Where my reason and his are the same, (we should not eat animals) our basis for this reason is quite different. Where my reason is for my compassion towards animals, and the strange bond I seem to have with them, his was that he finds animals to be filthy, disgusting creatures, and wants to have nothing to do with them, especially not putting them in his mouth.

Pork Faggots? By Jared - 07/21/2003 - 7:03pm I searched this site for the joke, but apparently there is not one.

Flavor of the Month. By Jared - 07/20/2003 - 11:44am I was watching the new SUM 41 dvd and there is a scene where some idiot is outside their tour bus yelling at them that they are the Flavor of the Week. I love when someone who is not the flavor of ANYTHING is heckling a band at a sold out show, and outside a BIG ASS tour bus. I guess all these bands whose albums have gone nearly platinum should just give up and tell the fans to fuck themselves and just go get shitty office jobs instead. I mean why bother taking advantage of free pussy, free drugs, free travel, stage adrenalin, product endorsements, oh did I mention the free drugs and pussy? I was backstage at a NOFX show last month, and after the show I went up to the stage area to search for goodies. I found a bag of pills (Vicodin, Soma, Percocet) thrown up there by a fan. Also I found a number of GIRLS shirts, meaning there were shirtless girls somewhere during and after the show. Well guess what? When I sit at my desk job, or create my website, NO ONE throws bags of GOOD pills at me, and girls sure as fuck don’t throw their clothes at me in an effort to let me see their tits so I will let them come over and let me jack off on them. I get hit on via e-mail periodically but it’s never local. It’s the UK, Brunei, the Ukraine etc… Well that does me no damn good… I mean what am I supposed to do with that?

And She Told Me She Had a ***. By Jared - 07/18/2003 - 7:20pm I have always respected NOFX. But suddenly I hear them all over KROQ, and that's fine. You gotta make some money at some point. BUT, this new single, "Franco UnAmerican" is fucking horrible. There is absolutely NOTHING good about it. Tonight on MTV I saw the new Seether video. The line in the song is "And then she told me she had a gun". But, MTV blocks the word gun, even though it is essential to the understanding of what the song is about. So I guess rock bands can't say the word gun in a song, but every gang bang nigger with a video can flash 20 gang signs in each video, with each sign representing different gangs that often kill people with GUNS. I just don't see why this gang bullshit is allowed on MTV but Weezer's "Hashpipe" had the word HASH taken out, or Everclear's "Heroin Girl" had the word HAPPY taken out of the lyric "I'm HAPPY in hell with my heroin girl".

The New Metallica Sucks By Jared - 07/17/2003 - 7:54pm